The Small Escape

 I've never been a gamer.

Even as a kid, it felt like too much effort for little reward. Clicking all those buttons, making all those decisions, reacting quickly (never my strong suit) again and again.


But I've always kinda enjoyed watching other people play them.


Immersing yourself in a world and a story and letting it wash over you is relaxing. And letting it happen without all the aforementioned effort makes watching games unfold far more relaxing than actually playing them (and isn't the ultimate purpose of a computer game to relax and have fun, after all?).


So, in my youth, I'd watch my friends play their PlayStation games. And I'd reluctantly join in briefly now and again before quickly getting frustrated or overwhelmed and handing the controller back to its rightful owner. And, in later years (my thirties, I guess), I'd sometimes zone out to a Twitch stream late at night until I was ready to sleep.


But, on a whim, I recently bought a handheld retro gaming device (surely there's a snappier name for them?). It's early days yet. I've only played a couple of games on it—neither of which I've beaten yet (isn't "Beating the game" a funny phrase? Like, are you playing the game, or are you playing against the game?). Still, I enjoy sitting down and playing something—immersing myself in a world and story—for an hour or so (usually less) at the end of the night.


I'm not sure how long it will last, and it feels like pure escapism (which has never really been my jam), but it's cool for now. Maybe especially for now—bc the world seems incredibly fucked up, and being able to escape from it for a bit seems like a sensible thing to do for a while.

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